Story for the Worker

Her name was Maria. We'd been best friends since junior infants. We'd grown up together spending hours of the day together. We spent most of primary school sitting beside each other. Most of it was spent talking and joking; giggling about stupid things we'd seen on tv the night before. It was a great time looking back on it now.

She was just so wonderful and perfect and had the most amazing smile and the warmest Touch. She was the most compassionate loving person I'd ever met; a kind Soul with a heart of gold.

So years passed by and it was in my teens then I began to feel something more for her but she still just saw us as friends... She had no idea how I wanted to be with her so much. It felt worse than rejection ever could. To have someone you love so deeply so close and yet so far. Right there, beside you, close enough to touch, but miles away on another world. You meet her every day and yet you don't really truly meet. There's this divide there. She doesn't have a clue how you feel at all. And it makes you feel so alone. Really alone...

So I surrounded myself with people. With a broken heart I drifted from club to club, rave to rave, one night stand to one night stand but nothing ever filled the void. I just felt so empty and aimless. I just had no purpose. It was all about temporarily distracting me from thinking about her. I needed to find something permanent.

So I decided to find someone to replace her in my Heart, someone to fill the void in my soul. I wandered around london dating. Hopping from pub to pub, going through several in one night. Meeting tens of girls a night. But with most there was just no spark. And the few with which there was left me feeling nothing when our lips touched.

So I gave up. No one could replace her. I'd never find anyone with the warmth of her touch, the kindness of her soul. It was a hopeless endeavour.