July

She'd tried online dating before - a brief encounter here and there -

Published Tuesday, 14th Jul 15:28 BST

She'd tried online dating before - a brief encounter here and there - but nothing like this. This dating site was into squishy food in a big way. Through it, she met a guy who could only fuck in a bathtub full of baked beans. Nothing else would do.

I had a brief encounter withan ex the other day it was quite nice to b

Published Sunday, 12th Jul 12:20 BST

I had a brief encounter withan ex the other day it was quite nice to be honest and we had both moved on from that period in our lives. We shared an embrace that reminded me so much of what we once had. He was so handsome but it was ok because i had a new equally handsome boyfriend in my lover mike. He is excellent. We had started dating about 5 months after my ex and i parted ways, i actually met him in a brief encounter at the copy machine at work since we worked on different floors it was unlikely that we'd ever met each other before. I was on his floor that day because as technology is so unreliable the copier on floor 7 was bust. I'm glad it did break though otherwise i would never have met him. I didn't want it to be a rebound idea so i kept away from him as much as i could but he was pretty irresistible. The new brief encounter was in the lift down at the end of the day. It was only us two and couldn't help but tell him how handsome he was. He complimented me back and we shared such a passionate embrace that i didn't want it to end. Of course it had to because we were only in a lift and the doors were opening. We swapped numbers outside the building and he promised to call me. I know this could lead to some upset and disappointment but as i got in i saw i had a message on my machine. I pressed play and listened to his smouldering voice down the phone line and re lived our embrace in my head. He had invited me out on a date that evening to a wonderful new restaurant in town and i wasn't going to pass up the opportunity. So we went out that night and continued to date every night for the next couple of months, he's moved in with me now and i guess its a pretty whirlwind idea. I don't regret it at all.

Sammy met a guy on an internet dating site she knew from the moment th

Published Sunday, 12th Jul 12:19 BST

Sammy met a guy on an internet dating site she knew from the moment they started sending each other messages that this was true love and couldn't wait to make love by candle light and for him to tickle all her taste buds in the bedroom department.

I've been with an online dating website for four months and still have

Published Saturday, 11th Jul 22:22 BST

I've been with an online dating website for four months and still haven't found that someone special, don't get me wrong there were a few profiles I liked and messages were sent to and fro, but that's just how it stayed and eventually the messages stopped.

I was swinging through the trees one day when I found a passion fruit

Published Saturday, 11th Jul 22:16 BST

I was swinging through the trees one day when I found a passion fruit among its branches. I devoured it whole. It tasted very nice. I hear passion fruit is good for your heart. So I ate some more. But then I had a stroke anyway. But a magical maroon monkey resurrected me. He was dancing nearby when he heard the thud of my falling from the trees. We then became best friends and he brought me around to his friends' house. They were all delicious wild boars, so I ate them all whole, without salt. My my were they delicious. But then I had another stroke from all the fat cursing through my veins. My heart exploded this time. So I thought, during my death, that there was no hope of me getting revived. But I was wrong. The magical monkey turned out to be quite a good chum. He spent several days meditating, on a diet of only green tea leaves and refuse and eventually god listened and granted him a wish to give me a new heart. So I got a new heart and was brought back to life. And me and the monkey became good chums again. So then we went on magical quests together, doing battle with all manner of evil creatures, from giant dinosaurs to sentient mushrooms. We had quite the adventure together. We traversed many mountains and crossed many lakes, hiked through many forests and left many dead in our wake. But they were bad guys so it was alright. Then we found an old soviet bunker. And in it was a cache of nuclear weapons, a large chunk of the old soviet's arsenal it would seem, judging from the never ending rows of silos that dotted the landscape. So we set off the nukes for fun one day and destroyed the whole universe. There was only me, the magical maroon monkey and a passion fruit left. So I ate the passion fruit and the monkey as a meal and then had a stroke and died. And that was the end of the universe.

I wanted to find true love so I went to my bedroom and found an idol o

Published Saturday, 11th Jul 20:49 BST

I wanted to find true love so I went to my bedroom and found an idol of a god and I rubbed it and a genie appeared. I said to the genie I need help dating women. He said sure. So he teleported me to India. He said I needed to visit his birthplace and meditate and all that before I became one with the universe and could find true love. So we drove around the place, took walks on the beach, did yoga and drank some green tea. Then I said I am ready. And he said good. Then we went to the shop and bought some roast beef. The roast beef was good. In fact it was great. I've never had such great food in my life. And then we meditated over a volcano and we supped the dew off of a new born flower. Then we walked all the way to the beach and we had a good swim. We swam out to the sea and then a tornado whisked us up and transported us to Zen. There we were one with the universe so I returned to earth and went back to my bedroom, put the genie back in the idol and put the idol back on my bedside table. Then I went out into the world and sure enough I met my true love. Her name was Mary and she was an architect from Vienna. We quickly darted to the bedroom and made sweet passionate love to each other. Then we got married and all our friends and family visited and we then went off on a honeymoon to Cameroon. Where we visited the poor people and showered them with money. Then we returned home infested with parasites and had to go to the doctor. We were bedridden for many months until the sickness had left our system. Then we went and journeyed to the centre of the earth in a machine built by doctor Grosky. Then we flew on a plane to the sun and we landed on it and had a good holiday there. I got a nice tan.

It was Saturday night, me and two friends, Maria and Lacey decided to

Published Saturday, 11th Jul 03:49 BST

It was Saturday night, me and two friends, Maria and Lacey decided to have a girls night in at my place. We all have been single for quite sometime and have decided that we have had enough of men since dating has always been a disaster.

There was once a woman who was so stunning she learnt how to control e

Published Saturday, 11th Jul 03:36 BST

There was once a woman who was so stunning she learnt how to control everyone around her, it was quite amazing as everyone was so jealous of the status and power she had, she could just do it without even trying. She was so beautiful so stunning and so exciting she had one of those exciting personalities that people would actually kill for, she was stunning and she knew how to use it! She'd tried london dating it was an agency where people meet each other and it worked out to be quite good for her. She needed to hold somone again and she wanted someone to hold her again she fount it dead exciting knowing that someone was going to hold her.

It was great to hear about free dating sites. The idea of them being f

Published Saturday, 11th Jul 03:23 BST

It was great to hear about free dating sites. The idea of them being free was incredible. It would not have to cost for searching for that special soul mate any more and for Jake, this was fantastic. Jake just wanted to be able to be passionate with his soul mate. He knew how to be passionate. He had been passionate with people he had thought were his soul mate before. He loved to whisper in a girl's ear so that the whisper gave her a strange but sweet sensation. He also thought that to whisper in a girls ear was much more romantic than just speaking out aloud. whispering had more significance. It was more intimate. More personal. More meaningful, and of course, more romantic and passionate.

He always wanted to try out speed dating to see how it would make him

Published Saturday, 11th Jul 03:19 BST

He always wanted to try out speed dating to see how it would make him feel. His friend has tried speed dating and said it made him feel amazing knowing he was meeting gorgeous people all the time. Gorgeous people that he could have a good time caressing if he got to know them a lot better. His friend said if he was caressing a gorgeous young woman he would feel incredible. So, he himself decided to try out speed dating and see if he could find anybody interesting that he would enjoy caressing. He was not sure whether speed dating would be any good. He knew he would only get around five to ten minutes, if that, with each person and for him, he was not so sure if this was enough time to really get to know somebody. What was he supposed to do? Say hi, exchange a number, perhaps slip in his name and then say Bye?

I had a very very brief encounter with a man last summer and I can't s

Published Friday, 10th Jul 16:29 BST

I had a very very brief encounter with a man last summer and I can't say that that brief encounter was all too pleasant. For starters, he was short - like if I stood on my toes, I'd be taller than him. Plus his head looked kinda weird, like he should have been a tall person. The only short man I'm going out with is Prince - he's sex on little legs - an idol, giddily lovable beyond belief.I don't know why I was intimate with this guy. I shouldn't have. Actually, I do know. I'd been feeling under the weather for a while, hadn't been dating men for a longer while and I guess I paid attention to someone who paid attention to me. He was definitely not my type, hence the rather brief encounter. He wasn't that great in bed either - he couldn't give me a normal hug without getting a hard on. And when we were intimate, he always kissed me, then aimed for my tits and vagina as if that's all I was made of, as if other parts of me weren't sexually sensitive. A sex idol he definitely wasn't, let alone a love god.

Anna has been married to her husband for about three years by now, and

Published Friday, 10th Jul 16:20 BST

Anna has been married to her husband for about three years by now, and they love each other less and less everyday. They were childhood sweethearts,they went to the same primary schools, same high school and same university, the pair of them always stick together like fish and water. However, after they got married their relationship is getting worse and worse. They do not talk to each other though they are sitting side by side on the sofa. They even hardly touch each other or look at each other. Their family and friends are very confuse about their reactions towards to each other, it looks like there is no love in the marriage. It is two o'clock in the morning, Anna's husband Peter is sitting in front of a computer screen in the study room logging in to a dating websites calls ' touch and stroke'.He then goes straight into the chat room to search for a woman calls 'Wet Pussy'. Peter and 'Wet Pussy' met each other on the dating websites two years ago, since then they have been having an affair, Peter even invite 'Wet Pussy' home to have sex while Anna is not there. And one afternoon, Peter brought 'Wet Pussy' home again,once they got into the house, Peter started to touch 'Wet Pussy's firm full breasts, then he unzipped her tight pink dress, squeezing her nipples, then carried her into the bedroom. While they were making wild love, Anna came back from work early, she opened the bedroom door, saw 'Wet Pussy' spreading her legs wide and Peter is sucking her pussy. Anna's heart sank, she didn't know what to do, then she shouted 'What are you doing?You get out!'Wet Pussy' was frightened, she quickly grabbed her clothes and ran to her car then driven off. Peter just sat up on the bed saying without any emotion:'I met her on a dating website, she is a real woman, not like you, she lets me to touch her anywhere I like, but you never let me to have sex with you, I still love you, but I need sex as well, I am a man after all. I didn't mean to break your heart, please understand.' Anna's heart was beating fast, she was very angry and hurt,she couldn't believe what she just seen with her own eyes. Since that day, they never talk to each other anymore, they had became two strangers living in the same house.

Jane said that online dating was only for sad people and for people wh

Published Friday, 10th Jul 11:57 BST

Jane said that online dating was only for sad people and for people who have never had a girlfriend to caress of course Jane was a master in the bedroom and every man wanted to caress her, she had had a girlfriend before her current boyfriend, so she classed herself as bisexual. She liked the best of both worlds as she used to call it. Of course this made her a master in the bedroom and having a girlfriend really opened her eyes up to life, she could caress everyone she wanted to she was so stunning and amazing everybody loved her, and being good in the bedroom was just an extra of hers.

I was on my way to a meeting today when I was hit by a wave of rainwat

Published Friday, 10th Jul 11:24 BST

I was on my way to a meeting today when I was hit by a wave of rainwater. The swollen torrents were on every corner. I looked like a lovable wet noodle for my very important meeting. Not something I normally get myself into, but I was in a real hurry to get this proposal over with, and walked right into it. One of those days that you know you probably would have been better off just staying in bed day; if this proposal wasn’t scheduled for today I would have after the night I had last night.

Darren Brown is 50 years old now, somehow, he is still single, living

Published Thursday, 9th Jul 23:23 BST

Darren Brown is 50 years old now, somehow, he is still single, living in a small rented flat. He has a lovely personality, people ask him to do something, he never says no to them even the work is dirty and heavy, he never moans about anything, always with a smile on his face however, he is very thin, he doesn't eat much at all, the whole day, he can just eat a couple of pork pie and drink few cup of coffee. He has been working hard for all his life, working overtime a lot, and that might beone of the reasons he could not find a love one, he didn't have time, but now he is getting old and life getting more and more lonely, he needs love in his life.

London dating was popular and well known for matching beautiful and go

Published Thursday, 9th Jul 22:12 BST

London dating was popular and well known for matching beautiful and gorgeous women with equally beautiful and gorgeous men. There was this certain beautiful women who caught a certain guy's eye one day and it was not long before they were soon sharing a quick embrace. The embrace was so passionate and hot that they just wanted to embrace more and it was not long before they were rushing to book a hotel and find a room. After a night of hot passion, the man decided he had had enough of this gorgeous women and just left her. The women awoke to an empty bed and was devastated that she had been used. She felt dirty, cheap and worst of all, crushed because she had let herself believe in finding a nice guy through dating a random man in London but the only place it left her in was in tears.

dating sites are a great way to find somebody you adore and build rela

Published Thursday, 9th Jul 21:18 BST

dating sites are a great way to find somebody you adore and build relationships with people. Perhaps even a romantic relationship that could lead to you finding your husband or wife. This is how it was for Matt and Eve. Matt was looking to adore a woman and it was not long before he met Eve on a dating site and they began to adore each other. Matt loved how Eve had such soft cheeks, soft skin and just appeared to be soft and cuddly which he found really cute. Matt imagined how he would love to just sit and cuddle Eve under the stars or under the moonlight and just listen to each others heart beating, feel the impulse of each others skin and just be able to hold hands and touch each other was an amazing thought for Matt and something he really wanted.

Chloe was just 16 when she decided to go for internet dating. It wasn'

Published Thursday, 9th Jul 20:43 BST

Chloe was just 16 when she decided to go for internet dating. It wasn't something she thought of herself, but once asweet guy on myspace asked her out- she couldn't say no! She had talked to him alot online, and he seemed really lovable, and he genuinely cared about her! The guys profile saidthat he was 19, but after they had been going out for a few days he confessed that he was actually 27. "No big deal" thought Chloe, "hes still the most lovable and sweet 27 year old I've ever talked to!". As they talked they started to make future plans. Chloe had never had a boyfriend before and wasn't aware that things were moving far to fast when he suggested getting married. "Of course we will waituntil you are older, then I will propose to you and we will be husband and wife!". This sounded very exciting toChloe, and sheagreed to meet up with him for the first time. She went to thetrain station with her best friend and eagerly looked for someoneresembling the internet picture of her future husband. "Chloe?" a man looking abit like a tramp sitting on a pull-along case said.She turned round, and suddenly realised - the tramp was her boyfriend! Her stomach flipped. and she regretted ever talking to the sweet, lovable myspace guy. He looked alot older in real life, and the idea of being with him terrified her. After turning away briefly, she summoned enough courage to go over. "I have to be polite to him at least - hes come all this way to see me!" she thought. He seemed to like her straight away, and insisted in holding her hand as they walked through town. "This is a nightmare" thought Chloe. She clung to the fact that when today was over he would have to go home and she would never see him again. They wondered around town for a bit, but Chloe was so scared of the guy that she pretty muchignored him in favour of her best friend. This annoyed him and he stopped and shouted at her. Terrified that he might hurt her, she told him that she had to go home now.Later that night she sat on her bed crying at how stupid she had been. She felt physically sick when she thought about him, and the idea of him being her future husband was terrifying!

Having been divorced for several years and no children. Carol decided

Published Thursday, 9th Jul 18:12 BST

Having been divorced for several years and no children. Carol decided she needed something new and exciting. Something different. Someone to cuddle up with in front of the television after work. She wanted to find her soul mate. So, she decided to join an online dating website, in hope it will help her find her true soul mate.

Sophie was board of dating boys from her country village, so she decid

Published Wednesday, 8th Jul 22:37 BST

Sophie was board of dating boys from her country village, so she decided to try on-line dating, - maybe she would meet someone exciting! Shewanted to try and get a boy froma town - he would be more exciting than country boys! She logged onto the first dating site she found, and immediately typed in 'London' into the search box. "You cant get a bigger town than London!" she thought to herself. As she browsed through peoples profiles, she was amazed at the ease of on-line dating. There were so many profiles to choose from, but each could be narrowed down by search phrases such as 'blind date'. Soon she came to a picture of a boy that made her look twice, no three times! He had fashionable shoulder length blond hair, trendy sunglasses on, andbest ofall - he lived in London!She contacted him, and in no time at allthey were really close. "So", he said one day as they emailed each other. "Where do you wanna go on our first date?!" Sophie smiled. "Anywhere at all! As long as its in London!" "Aha" laughed the boy. "So you've heard about the London dating then!?!". Sophie didnt know what he ment. "london dating" he explained "is atheorythat having your first date in London means that your relationship will last for decades! Its much better than on-line dating!". "Sounds good to me" Sophie giggled, already fantasizing about their first date.The next week Sophie got the train to London. She had agreed with the boy to meet him on the 1st bench in Paddington train station. She had been sitting there on her own for about 10 minutes when she herd a slight tapping noise, it didn't bother her, so she didn't turn around, but soon a voice said quietly"Sophie?". Sophie turned round, and there leaning on the wall behind the bench was her date! "Yes" she gasped, "Yes, I'm Sophie!". The boy smiled and sat down beside her. "That's lucky" he said, "it would have been embarrassing if you had been someone else!". Sophie looked confused "But how could I have been anyone else? I don't look that different to my profile picture do I?!". "Ah" said the boy. "There's something you should know about me...these sun glasses...I wear them because I'm blind. I don't actually know what your profile picture looks like!...Sorry." Sophie was shocked, and realised that the tapping noise she had heard earlier was the stick he used to findwhere things were. "You don't mind do you?" asked the boy. "You didn't exactly ask for a blind date!". "No of course not!" Sophie cried "I think you re incredible! I don't mind that you're blind at all! Come on - lets go and get a bite to eat!", and with that Sophie walked away from the bench proudly holding the hand of her new blind date.

Sometimes people may wonder if there is any such thing as true love. C

Published Wednesday, 8th Jul 22:36 BST

Sometimes people may wonder if there is any such thing as true love. Can true love really exist? Most people always know of at least one couple who break up, after lots of time of saying they are in love or really like each other which would oppose the idea that true love can exist. Some people wonder if Internet dating is a good way to find somebody nice. Leanna knew of a couple who met through internet dating and they seemed to be lovestruck. They really liked each other and would talk all the time. It was as if they were the perfect Internet couple but the problem was friends of the couple debated whether the relationship was realistic. It was not as if they could hug orcuddle or kiss or even just talk in person and so many believed it was just liking the idea of having somebody to connect with over the Internet and forgetting a computer screen was in between them. Leanne was not so sure, she knew the couple very well and it was obvious, without doubt that they really did seem to have a special bond. Leanne would listen to the guy in the couple tell her about how he dreamt of his lady, how he would stroke her hair, stroke her skin and stroke her cute face and he wanted to just hold her and protect her. When Leanne heard this she knew she needed to get the couple to meet up in reality so that they could be together in person. She decided to surprise them by secretly organising a special Valentines day surprise. She sent cards to each of their houses with a flight ticket in and details of where to go. Obviously, both were unaware of what Leanne had been scheming but had a small idea that perhaps this was Leanne getting them together. There was a natural instinct too, that they would be meeting soon so they got on their flights and went to their designated meeting place. Sure enough, they met and sparks flew. It was the perfect meeting ever and Leanne was pleased with her work.

Story for the Worker